You ever feel like motherhood turned your world upside down? Like, you're not the same person you were before? Yep there's a word for that! It's called matrescence, and it's basically a HUGE identity shift that happens when you become a mom. Kinda like how teenagers go through those awkward years, but with way more spit-up and way less eyeliner (hopefully!).
Matrescence is like a rebirth, a total transformation that affects you on every level: physically, emotionally, and even how you see the world. It's like stepping into a whole new dimension where YOU are the main character, but also, you're responsible for these tiny humans who rely on you for everything. Talk about pressure!
This shift can be super intense because it's not just about changing diapers and singing lullabies. It's about figuring out who you are NOW, in this new role, and how to balance all the different parts of yourself. It's like trying to juggle flaming torches while riding a unicycle...on a tightrope...over a pit of alligators. (Okay, maybe not THAT intense, but you get the idea!)
My Chat with Sarah Sterling: A Fellow Mom and Parenting Coach
I recently had a heart-to-heart with Sarah Sterling, a parenting coach and mama of two who totally gets it. She shared her own experiences with matrescence, and let me tell you, it was like looking in a mirror!
Sarah's journey was full of ups and downs, just like mine. She had to deal with the NICU when her first baby was born, which is scary stuff. But with her second, she felt this amazing burst of creativity and self-discovery. It just goes to show that every motherhood experience is unique, and there's no "one size fits all" approach.
The Maternal Wall: When Motherhood Feels Like a Cage
One thing that really resonated with me was Sarah's talk about the maternal wall. It's this invisible barrier that society puts on moms, with all these expectations and limitations. It's like, "Oh, you're a mom now? Well, you can't have a career AND be a good parent. You have to choose! Or the opposite of that like you MUST do it all!"
The maternal wall can make you feel trapped, like you're losing your identity and your choices. It's like being stuck in a maze where every path leads to a dead end. But Sarah reminded me that we have the power to break down those walls and create our OWN paths.
Finding Your Voice: Speak Up, Mama!
Sarah's advice? Use your voice! Don't be afraid to speak up for what you need and want. It's easy to get caught up in taking care of everyone else, but you deserve to be heard too.
Sarah shared how she started an anonymous Twitter account to vent about the struggles of motherhood. It was her way of letting it all out, without feeling judged. And guess what? It led her to discover her passion for writing and becoming a parenting coach! So, you never know what amazing things can happen when you start using your voice.
Self-Compassion and Letting Go: The Keys to Freedom
Motherhood can be a wild ride, and it's easy to get overwhelmed. That's why self-compassion is SO important. Don't beat yourself up if things don't go perfectly. We're all just doing our best, right?
Sarah also stressed the importance of letting go. It's okay to ask for help, to delegate tasks, and to trust that others can do things their own way. It doesn't have to be perfect; it just has to get done. And when you let go of some of that control, you create space for more joy and freedom in your life.
Finding the Joy in the Journey: It's Not Just About the Destination
It's easy to get caught up in the "what's next?" of motherhood. Like, "I'll be happy when my baby sleeps through the night," or "I'll feel like myself again when they start school." But we are reminded that it's not just about the destination; it's about enjoying the journey.
Find the joy in the everyday moments, even the messy ones. Embrace the chaos, the laughter, the tears, and the triumphs. Because THIS is your life, mama, and it's happening right now.
You've Got This, Mama!
Matrescence is a journey of self-discovery, a chance to become an even stronger, more amazing version of yourself. It's not always easy, but it's SO worth it.
So, embrace the identity shift. Find your voice, practice self-compassion, and let go of the need for control. And most importantly, remember that you are not alone. We're all in this together, navigating the wild and wonderful world of motherhood.
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